nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Randomize
