I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
