it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
a search helicopter?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
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