It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
