It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Randomize
