Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
