Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize
