just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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