Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
