How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
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