I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
