worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
Randomize
