your thong is hanging out like whoa
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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