I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
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