i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Randomize