ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
