the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Randomize
