ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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