Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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