Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize