I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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