How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
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