i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Randomize
