jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
