What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
