"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
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