Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
I need a burrito and a hug.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.