Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
