let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
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