Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
I need a beard to bite.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Randomize
