I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize
