Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
