If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Randomize
