# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Randomize
