I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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