theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Randomize
