She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
wanna go halves on a baby?
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
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