I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
Randomize
