I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
