Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
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