glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Randomize
