I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
Randomize
