you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize
