just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
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