I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize