When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
