i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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