WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
