I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce