32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Randomize