Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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